POSH ON AMY: SHE'S AN ICON

so do tank tops, beehives, and crack weight a style icon make? just asking...

london--"she has a real sense of style that i just love. she's very much a fashion icon and i adore what she wears. she's unique and original." victoria beckham talking about amy winehouse in london's daily mirror. okay, so am i the only one who sees amy winehouse as a pure crack/coke/smack head? or maybe i'm the one on drugs.....

THE NEW HAUTE ACCESSORY: BICYCLES

this is the quintessential city bike - also called the "city bike" - by jorg & olif. it retails for about $595 or less. (thanks to bikeportland.org for the photo.)
one of three bmx bikes outfitted by puma, available for the holidays. check out puma's black store in new york city or tokyo for prices and purchase. (thanks to freshnessmag.com for the photos)

new york -- according to the december issue of american vogue, bicycles are the hautest new accessory. i agree. take a stroll through the streets of london and other european cities and you will see person after person commuting on bicycle. from stylish young women to smart middle aged men, they are all riding in stye. jorg & oliff is the go-to brand for fashionistas. puma has also just debut accessorized bmx bikes that are as good for your wardrobe as they are for your daily commute.

MOSCHINO SHOWS HEART

moschino's plexiglass doll/clock for unicef. (thanks to fashionweekdaily.com for the photo)

new york-- moschino has partnered with the triennale design museum in milan to design a "love clock," which will be auctioned off this month. proceeds will go to UNICEF to help in their fight to treat childhood HIV/AIDS around the world. the doll which is made of plexiglass will be auctioned off at Sotheby's on december 18.

PROENZA SCHOULER MOVES ON MARC

lazaro hernandz and jack mccollough, the dynamic duo behind the brand. (thank you to nymag.com for photo)

a sneak peak at the designers secondary line for target which debuts in february. (thanks to thebudgetfashionista.com)

new york -- faster than you can ask "does the media still love marc jacobs?" proenza schouler, the label, has announced that it will be showing it's fall 2008 collection on monday, february 4th at 8pm --- the same day and time marc jacobs was supposed to show. as reported by the blay report last week, jacobs dumped this long held time slot, picking instead, the following friday to show his collection. proenza schouler will show at the park avenue armory for the second year in a row.

CHANEL PREFALL: SPECTACULAR CHIC

so what would karl lagerfeld wear if he were a transgender lounge act dressing as amy winehouse for halloween? the chanel prefall collection is the answer. i mean this in the best way. trust me. (thank you to chris moore of catwalking.com for these fabulous photos)

london -- surely chanel forgot to invite me to it's fabulous pre-show collection. but i hold no grudges. guests like naomi campbell, claudia schiffer and kate moss made it just fine though. and boy were they rewarded. there are many ways to describe the collection, but i'll choose to do it as a question: what would karl lagerfeld wear if he was a girl and best friends with amy winehouse? that's exactly what this collection looks and feels like. the messy hair, streaking eyeliner, and tousled layers of clothing further drove home the point. overall, i think it was a strong collection in that it really stuck to the chanel identity - but revamped it by giving it more edge for the prefall season (something lagerfeld is an expert at.) personally, i wasn't into the entire collection but there were some strong dresses which i loved and it was refreshing seeing the mens loooks on the catwalk. see the entire collection online at the wonderful catwalking.com.

MORE PREFALL: ZAC POSEN + DOLCE & GABANNA

alas, the only piece i liked from the dolce & gabanna prefall collection.

i live for this jacket and how it's paired with those purple pumps! it's lady like, but still gives full-on drama with that fur.

pumps are still fab - and look amazing with this dress. so good for the holidays or an event or even a formal date.

zac takes a bow. looks good doesn't he? or is it just me?

(thank you to style.com for these fabulous photos. log on to their website to see both collections in their entirety!)

new york -- yes, so it looks as though our invitation to these pre-fall collection shows slipped through the cracks as well. no worries! thanks to google i was able to review these and relay the information to you, my dear and devoted reader. zac posen's show was spot on! sexy, fresh and creative: the concept was "poodle ballet." oddly enough, despite the strange name once you see the collection in entirety, you understand. dolce & gabanna's was held in their new madison avenue boutique and the clothes were displayed on mannequins instead of models. to describe their theme, domenico dolce told style.com, "It's about what people need in the moment," said Dolce. "Party dresses inspired by orchids for early summer; D&G classics with a new style and volume for our new markets, like Japan; and gray everyday clothes," for, well, everyday. i love the bold colors and flirty silhouettes in this collection. but that's about it.....

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND WANT YOU TO BE WELL DRESSED

sneak peek: here are some of the pieces which will be available for spring/summer 08 at h&m. (thanks to h&m press department for these photos)

worldwide-- blaynistas! guess what i have for youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!? a super-special discount just for you to h&m. just in time for the holiday season the good folk at my favorite store, hennes & mauritz and the good folks at my favorite blog glam.com have gotten together to offer glam bloggers and their readers a timely treat. all you have to do is log on to www.hmfriendsandfamily.com and sign up to recieve 25% - yes 25% - off of your purchase this saturday and sunday. run, don't walk. and pick up a lil something for me!

HAYDEN'S NEW BAG: BUT DO YOU LIKE THE AD?

ummmm. me no like. (thanks to justjared.com for this ad.)

u.s.a -- so i spied this dooney and bourke ad featuring hayden pannetierre and her new namesake bag. as reported by the blay report earlier this year, panittiere was brought in my the label to design this bag and follows in the footsteps of young starlets like mischa barton, lindsay lohan and emma roberts. so what do you think? want to know what i think? i thought you did! well, for one i like the bag. i love the bright cherry color. the patent sheen is right on trend. and the huge "hp" tag - though a bit tacky - is a nice touch. that said though, WHO STYLED THIS AD!???? i feel like everything else in the photo - from the pose, to the voluminous hair, to that cheap looking ruched dress, totally, totally takes away from the bag and drives the whole photo away from the mod-classic look they were going for. am i alone in my thoughts? let me know!

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE'S LUXE AMBITIONS

j.t and designer walk the runway after the recent william rast runway show. (thank you to brandfeature.net for the photo)

new york -- timberlake's wack clothing line (seriously, it totally lacks luster) is now gearing up to expand into a new (and predictable) category: luxury! surprisingly though, they are doing it right. they have signed with the j. lindberg label, hiring their consulting firm in new york to design a mens and womens collection for them. marcella lindberg will design the womens line, while johan lindberg designs the mens. should be interesting...stay tuned.

JUST COS: H&M's NEW VENTURE

(thanks to telegraph.co.uk for photos above.)

examples of what cos has to offer above. they are simple stylish classics, true. but aren't there other stores that provide that on the market? just asking....( thanks to stylebubble.typepad.com for photos above)

london--a school assignment compelled me to check out a store i would have otherwise ignored: cos, which stands for collections of style. the london store which i checked out is around oxford circus on regent street (don't think there is a u.s. location yet) . cos is the new initiative from hennes and mauritz which, of course, runs h&m. unlike h&m, cos is very clean and simple and minimalist. it is rooted in trends, but not a slave to it. they have a very balanced menswear and womenswear collection. and ironically, the menswear line is actually more adventurous than the womens wear with interesting fabrics, colors and cuts. the price points are very mid-market. don't expect to spend $100 on several outfits, instead, that might get you a button-down shirt or a light cardigan. the decor is very modern and simple. and the overall vibe is rich - but not luxe. (does that make sense?) final verdict? i'm lukewarm and undecided. i can't say i love it or hate it. what i will say is that there's potential. i want to see how this store grows and their collections develop in order to see and understand their true identity. i encourage you to check it out though and let other blaynista's know what you think.

23 & DOING IT: ESTEBAN CORTAZAR

and he's cute! esteban posing with my ex-baby daddy (franklin bumped him off that pedestal!) (thanks to viewimages for the photo)

paris -- what am i doing wrong? at 23 ( a whole year younger than me!!!) esteban cortezar has just been appointed chief designer for emanuel ungaro. the young talent beat out scores of other designers who were initially considered for the job by mounir moufarrige, chief executive of the label. he will now put aside his private label, esteban cortezar, to focus fully on reenergizing and hopefully stabilizing the flailing label which has seen three designers in less than three years. kudos to cortezar. how much do you think they paid him for the gig? and really, how long do you think he'll last? i can't call it!

JUICY BITS: ARE YOU READY FOR FASHION WEEK? OZWALD BOATENG? AND ISAAC MIZRAHI?

a look from the sean john collections' last runway show in 2002! now the wait is over. diddy and his clothes are making a return to fashion week! (thanks to view images for this pic)

london fashion week dates have been set! february 10th through the 16th! and guess who will be right there with first hand news reports? yours truly, zandile blay! watch out for exclusive scoops and stories!

oswald boateng is not playing. the ghanian born, british bred designer is gearing up to open 30 stores world wide in the next three years and is also opening a saville row, london, store in the coming weeks. i'll try to score a spot and an interview! stay tuned.

art basel miami is going on right now. it opened officially on wednesday and attracts the fashion and art world gliteratti. truly, truly, TRULY, wishing i was there right now. but alas....

want a one night stand with isaac mizrahi? then mark your calendars! on december 21st he will be at the blender theater at gramercy to give a cabaret performance. should be interesting....

puffy is back at fashion week! his collection, sean john, will be returning to the runway and is scheduled to show on february 8th at 6 pm. marc jacobs will be showing february 8th at 7 pm. new york fashion week is only about two months away and things are already starting to shape up....

MY JOURNEY FROM VAGUE TO VOGUE

honestly, this was a really bad cover. but i digress.....are you a vogue reader? (thanks to rumorofficial.com for photo)

london -- blaynistas! for many years i've simply not read vogue magazine. it's not that i wasn't aware of it - or of it's status as the fashionista's bible. it's just that i was bored. the magazine seemed old and staid and pretentious. but after coming to london and being steeped deeply in couture at my classes in saint martins, i decided to give the magazine a try. yesterday, i spent my good, hard borrowed cash on my first ever copy of american vogue (actually paid $10 once you convert to pounds.) it was the december issue with penelope cruz on the cover. well guess what? i loved it! i don't know if it's time, or london, but whatever the cause i found the magazine so much more exciting. the articles were well written and spot on. the fashion pictorials were stimulating and well styled. even ana wintour's letter to the readers had a certain charm to it. maybe i won't be a lifelong reader, but i'm definitely picking up the next copy. what are your thoughts? is it your style bible or the last magazine you look at?

A CHAT WITH...JYLL SASKIN, FASHION EDITOR OF THECAMPUSWORD.COM

not just smart - but incredibly stylish! fashion editor jyll saskin strikes a pose during fashion week in her favorite dvf dress bought at london's selfridges. she paired it with steve madden boots and a fabulous chanel bag borrowed from friend and fellow fashion writer, hayley phelan.

world wide web--dynamic, multi-tasking, and talented, jyll saskin, a tufts university junior is the epitome of today's student style journalist: in addition to a killer eye for clothes and a passion for fashion she has a strong work ethic, a host of interests outside of clothing, and an amazing gig as fashion editor of thecampusword.com, a web site that provides college journalists and students a platform to freely voice their opinions on college life. we had a chat - literally, on google chat - with her this sunday where we discussed everything from her duties at thecampusword.com, to her love for burlesque dancing. writers, and aspiring writer, take notes. this is one student editor who has a lot to treach.....

25 minutes

5:00 PM me: hi jill!
5:01 PM i'm all set now if you are
jsassy: yup, i'm set
5:03 PM me: so tell us a little bit about you and what you do for the campus word
5:05 PM jsassy: i'm a junior at tufts university in boston, majoring in psychology and child development, but i've always had a love for fashion. in june, i was asked to be the fashion editor at tcw (the campus word). basically, i write an article every week, and then i'm in charge of running a fashion staff of about 7 writers - approving their topics, editing their articles, choosing what gets published. and i get paid to do it! it's my absolute dream job
5:06 PM me: it sounds fabulous! how did you land it?
5:07 PM jsassy: well i used to be a fashion columnist at my school paper, the tufts daily, and i've been copy editing there as well for a few semesters. last february, tcw sent out an e-mail to the entire staff of the tufts daily, along with other college newspapers looking for writers, so i replied and was hired as a fashion writer
the site was extremely small back then, i never knew it would take off like it has
5:08 PM me: we've checked out the site and totally love it. it's more in depth and very professional for a "student run" site
jsassy: thank you. i take my job very seriously, so it's very important to me that it's well-edited and that we're taken as a serious source for fashion journalism
5:09 PM me: is it a challenge juggling between your duties there
and being a student?
5:10 PM jsassy: oh definitely! my housemates joke that they never see me, because i also do a ton of extra-curricular things at tufts. but i know that i'm a student first, fashion editor second, and everything else comes third. it has to be that way in order for me to be successful, but the balance can get difficult at times
5:11 PM me: wow!
how old are you again?
jsassy: haha i'm 20
me: you sound very driven and focused!
jsassy: thank you! i am... i went to an all-girl's school for 12 years that had this inane motto "girls can do anything." but i was always taught that i could handle anything and everything, and i really took that to heart. if i'm not constantly busy and working on something, i get bored
5:12 PM me: lots of my blaynistas (what i call the fabulous folks who read my blog) are students like you.
and just like you
they are passionate about a career in fashion.
do you have any advice for them
on how to reach their goals?
5:13 PM jsassy: wow... there are so many different ways to get into the industry, i wouldn't know where to start
me: well
;ets
*lets start
where we are: fashion journalism
jsassy: i guess the most important thing is to really be passionate about fashion, and not just read a magazine here and there, but read critically, analyze the trends, look at podcasts, know who's who
me: lots of folks are trying to break into that.....
5:14 PM jsassy: if you are still in college, write for the school paper, or send me an application to write for tcw :)
try to get published anywhere you can to build up a portfolio
and if you are good at what you do, you will be noticed
i guess that's the other hard thing - lot's of people want to be fashion journalists, but not everyone is good at it. and i don't mean that in a mean or conceited way, but you have to know what your strengths are and then play to them
5:15 PM me: if that's not sound advice, i don't know what is!!!!
what do you think is next for you after tufts?
5:16 PM jsassy: well i'd like to go to business school. you don't need anything higher than a bachelor's degree to be a fashion journalist, but i'd like to be an editor one day and an MBA is something that could really help me achieve that goal
and then i'd like to be a beauty editor at one of the nyc mags, and one day become editor-in-chief at an existing one or start my own
5:17 PM me: very ambitious and all very possible.
earlier
you mentioned that readers could reach out to you
if they want to write for the college word
jsassy: *the campus word
5:18 PM me: already in editing mode! thank you! :-)
jsassy: haha i can't resist
me: can you provide us with your email address or should
readers just go on the website and contact a general email there?
5:19 PM jsassy: if you want to work at tcw, fashion or otherwise, then e-mail staff@campusword.com and if you're interested in fashion, your info will be forwarded to me. they'll ask for a resume and writing samples, so be prepared for that. it's a great opportunity and a great way to make money during college
5:20 PM me: can you tell us what the rates are or is that confidential at this point?
jsassy: no it's not confidential
hired writers get paid US$15 per published article and are required to submit 3 articles per month
5:21 PM me: oh, not bad!
many places won't even give you transportation money
for what you write!
jsassy: it's not bad at all! these are beginning journalists, so it's so great to get paid in addition to all the great exposure
5:22 PM me: i wish i had that when i was starting out! by the way, since this is a fashion blog, we can't resist asking...with the holidays
5:23 PM around the corner, what do you plan on wearing
to the inevitable round of holiday parties
5:24 PM jsassy: my biggest dilemma! i just bought this beautiful 3.1 phillip lim black jumper on sale, so that with black tights and black marc by marc jacobs platform mary-janes is a definite contender. i also have this awesome dvf black dress with a red band around the bust that looks like lips, so since red is so festive (and my favourite colour) that's a contender as well, maybe with black ankle boots?
5:25 PM oh and by jumper i mean a type of dress, not a sweater!
5:27 PM me: lol!
5:28 PM i think the style savvy audience got that.
jsassy: i know in harry potter a jumper is a sweater haha
me: personally, i'm all about dvf, but i woud go
with the philip lim piece. it sounds fab!
jsassy: thank you! best part: it was 40% off :)
me: oh smart and stylish!!!
speaking of which, how would you
describe your personal style?
5:30 PM jsassy: well my mother always taught me two important style lessons: 1) less is more, and 2) quality over quantity. i'd call my personal style trendy-chic with a sexy twist. i like dressing with the trends but i'll never wear a trend simply because it's a trend, it has to look good on me and be flattering. and i love anything that sparkles - american apparel lame is my unhealthy obsession!!
5:31 PM me: oh then we share the same sicknes.
i live for them!
jsassy: i just got the track jacket in silver lame - i get the craziest stares around campus, but i absolutely love it
me: thanks so much ms. j. we were impressed with you to begin with but after telling us your style secrets, we are official fans!
5:32 PM jsassy: thanks zandile, it was such a pleasure!
me: thank YOU! oh and one last thing, we love compliments here, so could you please tell us why you like the blay report!?
5:34 PM jsassy: well i love the blay report because it gives me an inside scoop into what's happening in london fashion. it's great amidst all the talk of new york new york new york - don't get my wrong, i heart new york, but london fashion is so unique and special, and you do a great job of covering that
*me wrong
5:35 PM me: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! i'm beaming!
thanks again!!
:-)
jsassy: anytime :) enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Sex and the City (2008) Trailer 1

youtube--aaaaaaaaaaahhh the trailer. can't wait for this film to debut!

THE RUNDOWN: AlICIA KEYS

keys at the onda awards in spain. ( thanks to smartenupas.com for photo)

spain -- usually like to do just one a day, but savvy blay report reader lauren from boston brought this photo to my attention. notice anything besides the really odd cameltoe ? lauren did! the style star is showing that despite her regular workouts, she stil needs support. she managed to slide a pair of spanx panties on underneath that body hugging jumper. love the idea of slimming your bits for a slender silhouette. but i definitely don't love the execution....seeing those spanx makes the whole ensemble somewhat tacky. thanks for sharing lauren!

THE RUNDOWN: BEYONCE

nothing to hate and everything to love when it comes to this dress and the wearer.

paris-- the other day i got sucked into a beyonce marathon on youtube. for some strange reason (actually, specifically avoiding the articles i have to write) i got sucked into watching video after video of b shaking it in stilletos in concert. and something strange happened! i'm now a bonafide beyonce fan! maybe that's why i'm all over this look, which she was rocking while out with her b.f, jay-z, in paris. the dress accentuates her curves beautifully. two snaps and a twist! (lolz! remember that from in living color!?)

STORE FIGHT: LEVI'S BATTLES WET SEAL

yeah...i could've just gotten a photo of the actual jean pocket. but this is much more vivid. no? (thanks to shwimmerlegal.com for this racy photo)

san jose -- damn does wet seal ever learn? (most importantly does wet seal ever design good clothing? i digress...) almost ten years after levi's put the smack down on them in court for stealing - sorry, copying - their trademarked pocket-stitching style - wet seal is at it again. levi's just filed a complaint in federal court accusing wet seal of once again, infringing on their copy right.

CAN KATIE BE MY MOMMA? SURI CRUISE IN LOUBOUTIN'S

she doesn't even have a record deal or a modeling contract. yet this young chic has already been on the cover of vanity fair and now is getting her own louboutin's? i'm hating! (thanks to cbsnews.com for images)

new york - honestly, don't know if this is crazy or classic. ok! magazine reports that little, tiny (eerily beautiful) suri cruise is christian louboutin's youngest client. mom, katie holmes has had the tot's feet measured by the designer so he can create custom shoes for her. katie sure knows how to spend tom's money! props!

JUST PLAIN WONDERFUL: FASHIONISTA THROWS SHOWER

honestly, still so used to seeing this dude with hilary duff...but i guess there's a new chic in town. (thanks to people.com for photo)

los angeles --maybe this is more entertainment than fashion, but just had to share this news. people.com reports that nicole richie and joel madden surprised 100 expecting mothers with a surprise baby shower.it took place at the l.a. free clinic and mothers were given baby bjorn products, mattresses, crips and toys from fisher price. the total came up to over $200,000. it was all done in the name of free publicity - i'm so sorry! - the richie madden children's foundation, which the couple started. nicole says, "we named it the richie madden children's foundation becaue we each have families and our families are close and...involved." honestly, i really do think this is fabulous. it's strange to see richie, the fashionista, transform into richie, the mother. yet, it's beautiful all the same.

JUICY BITS: USHER'S NEW SCENT, COMME'S NEW SCENT & EMMA'S NEW JOB

usher at his u.s fragrance launch. (thanks to gossipchic.com for photo)

something about these bottles i don't like. am i the only one? (thanks to mimifroufrou.com for photo)

usher's fragrance launches in london tonite. the singer won't physically be there, but will be linked in to the event via video. i still don't get the names of of the frances (usher for him and usher for her), or understand why the bottles are so tacky..............speaking of fragrance...comme de garcon is launching a new one called "comme 8." it is currently available at london's burlington arcade until december 8th. it will enjoy a wider launch next year on march 17th.............katie grand has quit and mulberry now has a new creative director, emma hill. hill has designed for several major brands including gap and marc jacobs. according to fashionmonitor.com, we will see her handywork in the spring/summer 2009 collection. (was that a typo though? that's a very long time...)

WISH WE WERE THERE: CHANEL PRE-A/W SHOWING

lagerfeld has been in london for the past few days to launch chanel's new show. (thanks to dobizo.com for photo.)

london-as i type this, london's fahion elite are gathered to watch the chanel pre autumn/winter 2008 collection in london. according to press releases, this collection is an homage to the men who inspired coco chanel, such as boy capel and the duke of westminster. log on to chanel.com, where it wil be broadcast live to see. i'll do my best to post the video here.

VIVIENNE & MELISSA: A MATCH MADE IN BRAZIL

an example of the plastic shoes made popular by brazilian brand, melissa

westwood was recently given the outstanding achievement in fashion design award by the british fashion council.

brazil -- i can't say i've heard much about the brand "melissa" before. but apparently, they are sort of a big deal. they seem to originally be from brazil, and have enjoyed collaborations with designers like alexandre herchcovith (love him!) isabela capeto and karim rashid. now, they can add vivienne westwood to that list. the acclaimed london designer is visiting brazil in january to launch two new shoe styles for the brand.

NEW STORE BUZZ: AMERICAN EAGLE

a current -less dazzling - american eagle storefront. (thanks to images.mallfinder.com for photo)

new york -- is time square ready for this? american eagle is opening it's brand new flagship in the heart of time square. the 25,000 square foot space will be transformed into a dazzling, multi-media retail mecca according to wgsn.com. in an article from the website, american aeagle ceo jim o'donnell said, "american eagle outfitters looks forward to creating a world-class shopping destination for the people of new york, as well as customers from around the world at the times square flagship store."

FASHIONISTAS SPEAK: VICTORIA EXPLAINS IT ALL

do you like this cover? i honestly don't think i'm into it....(thanks to dlisted.com for photo)

u.s.a-- in the latest issue of elle with victoria beckham on the cover, she says: "I'm so camp! I'm such a gay man trying to get out." that's some brilliant insight. this quote actually helps me understand posh better!

TOM TAKES RUSSIA: FORD TO OPEN NEW STORES

the designer with his trademark smile.(blogdig.leftword.net).at top, a very interesting photo for his fragrance. very interesting. (adrants.com.) bottom,the inside of ford's new york store. (associated press.)


moscow--it's not a came at tom ford incorporated. the former gucci designer (sidebar:it's a shame. no matter how well he does, he will always live in the shadow of his gucci success. but i digress...) the former gucci designer has unveiled plans to launch two new stores in russia, according to several media reports. at russia's luxury business conference sponsored by the international herald tribune, ford disclosed the september 2008 launch of his moscow stores. as with all expanding brands right now, this is just for first of of many. according to fashion week daily, milan, beijing, dubai and zurich will all get the tom ford treatment. honestly, i'm loving the expansion. but why am i just not believing the success. his style is sexy and his bespoke suits are snazzy. but are folks - especially men - lining up to purchase them at $5,000+ price points? just asking.....

STRANGE BEDFELLOWS: TIFFANY'S & SWATCH

so what will a watch from tiffany's and swatch look like? i'm curious. (photos courtesy of buychinawholesale.uk.com. i know blaynistas! dodgy source, but hey!)

new york--tiffany's and swatch have joined forces to create a new media company. according to reuters, the new watch-making company will be "wholly owned" by swatch, yet will manufacture pieces under the tiffany's name. what does tiffany's get out of the deal? a chunky percentage of profits plus a seat on the five member board. the deal is initially set to be in place for twenty years. it's not the strange from a profit perspective. but in my opinion, this business structure is a bit odd as is the marriage between a mid-range and high-end brand within the same category. am i the only one who's confused?